Calling all Boys - I mean Men.

So, a few weeks ago, almost a month actually, I had finished reading Wild at Heart

It was such a good book, but I'm not here to tell you about it and that you should read it [If you are a guy READ IT. Heck if you are a girl read it too! I want to read Captivating].

What I do want to say is that someone today at school was talking about how men of God act too much like little boys. I was slightly offended by that because all though I fail so many times at this life I'm trying to live, I try nothing more than to be a man of God. It really got me thinking about what I had just finished and how John Eldredge is pretty much talking about how we [men of God] have to act like the men we have been called to be.

I've never challenged anybody before, but after that little cynical comment someone made I'm challenging all my guy friends to be the men we are called to be.

Let's take down the nice guy facade and replace it with a warrior ready to fight.
Let's stop being bored with this life we are called to live and start finding the adventures that God has put forth in our lives. Trust me there are many, and he's wanting us to find them.

Rick Baleros

Passage from Wild at Heart
"In the heart of every man is a desperate desire for a battle to fight, an adventure to live, and a beauty to rescue."

Home sweet home? Yes.

So, I went on my hall retreat with my Villians this weekend. I don't think there were any intentions for God to rock us like he does at retreats/conferences that I went to back in Oak Harbor. Not that we need retreats to have God rock us.

Anyways, I don't know about the other guys, but God did rock me this weekend. He didn't cause an earthquake in my heart, but he did shake me. He made something make sense.

For anything I'm going to say to make sense, we have to go back to two weeks ago...

I was kind of in a bind; I found myself not leaving any time to have one on one with God. I had gotten to a point where what used to identify me and where I found validation (volleyball, school, etc.) started to identify me once again. It was definitely like I was having identity problems. The greatest thing that could give me validation and give me some sort of identification, I wasn't giving the time of day to.

It started to make me feel homesick. Don't get me wrong, I miss my parents no doubt, but I started to miss them even more. It just didn't feel the same without them. Then I started missing the Youth Group back at Living Word. My brother's and sister's. My support system. My family.

The Youth Group back in Oak Harbor were the people I did life with my Senior year of High School ...

That's the thing though, God wanted to tell me something about you guys back at home this weekend:

"Rick, you're not in high school anymore, it's time to let it go. It's time to move on."

By no means was he telling me that my Youth Group couldn't be my family anymore, but that I was blinding myself from seeing the family that he put me into here at the University of Portland.


Psalms 68:6
"God places the lonely in families"

I'm not saying that I was lonely, but without the good ol' Youth Group at my side I was feeling lost. God knew what he was doing though when he placed me in a dorm that I didn't even apply for. He knew that he put me in the best dorm on campus :)


Villa Maria: All male & Catholic Frat house - words that are too shallow when it comes to describing the place I live.

Villa Maria: Brothers & Community - much better words to describe the place I call home and the place where my family comes from.

Again, God knew what he was doing. He put me with guys of different backgrounds and upbringings. He put me with guys that annoy me, anger me, laugh with me, laugh at me, but most of all, he put be with guys who challenge me.

Some of these guys have done nothing more than push me in my walk with god. I definitely don't like it, but they see that there's some growing up to do, and boy are they making sure I grow up.

I guess what I'm trying to say is that no matter how far we get from home, God is going to put us in a place that we can call home and find a family to do life with. I'm doing, living, and enjoying life with these guys.

Villa Maria - Home Sweet Home? Yes.

To everyone back at home: I miss you guys. I love you guys. MUAH :)

Rick Baleros

It's just one of those days.

It's Monday, and it's definitely one of those days where I wish I could hide from the world under my blanket and cry until tomorrow happened. But alas, I can't. I have to walk through this day - even if I don't want to ...

On a lighter note. I'm pretty sure I did really well on my Biology Exam that I had last Friday :)

I studied really hard for that exam.

The end.

Rick Baleros




James 1:2-6
"²Consider it pure joy, my brothers, whenever you face trials of many kinds, ³because you know that the testing of your faith develops perseverance. ⁴Perseverance must finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything. ⁵If any of you lacks wisdom, he should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to him. ⁶But when he asks, he must believe and not doubt, because he who doubts is like a wave of the sea, blown and tossed by the wind." (NIV)

Let's be honest here.

College has been fun. College has been great. Friends here. Friends there.

My faith life has been fun. My faith life has been great. God here. God there.

I want to be honest with you guys: I failed last semester at my relationship with God. I was strong in the beginning, but I only did it to prove that I wasn't another statistic in how many people lose their faith in college. I was doing my devotions daily - that became wishy-washy. I prayed for those I loved and the things I wanted to see God do - then I forgot who I loved and wasn't sure if I wanted to see the things God had in store. I was becoming a statistic.

I went from being this strong and mighty warrior in the midst of battle to a wounded gazelle in the savannah.

It seriously got to the point where I didn't want to believe anymore. A point where I doubted and asked myself "What was I getting myself into?" or even "Why am I doing this? What do I get out of it?" I was losing all the faith I had.

I was pretty much choosing when I wanted to love God. He didn't want that. He wanted me to love him all the time. On his time, not mine.



Winter break rolled around and I just thought of it as a time to "catch-up" on all the lost days I had with God. He other had plans. Some kind of "Spiritual Cleansing" if you want to call it that. It was intense in that he showed me not who I was before I accepted him into my life, but who I was when he was in my life.

Something about that shook me while I was in this "valley". I was full of life and had finally started to find my validation in something that was more real than this earth. I wanted to be that again. He was using all sorts of things to remind me who I was. I started to realize that the person I was becoming was not only a statistic, but someone ugly as well. I wore masks to hide my true self. He started to use old journal entries from high school to remind me of the person I was. Those old journal entries showed me my hurt and the tears that they brought along with them. I always thought those tears were a bad thing, but when I looked at it then, those tears were healing and that I wouldn't have to cry over those things again. I really wanted to hurt at the moment.

For the first time in the four months I had left Oak Harbor, I hit the ground hard and started running. I saw the importance of the things I used to do daily. I'm still struggling this semester, but I feel so much stronger than I did last semester. I've got a good mentor to talk things through with. I've fixed or gotten rid of some relationships that just weren't needed.

Last year I was running with God. I decided to take a break from it because I was tired. I'm running again guys. I'm running hard. I may hit a wall, but right now nothing can stop me.

Hebrews 12:1
"Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a huge crowd of witnesses to the life of faith, let us strip off every weight that slows us down, especially the sin that so easily trips us up. And let us run with endurance the race God has set before us." (NLT)

Rick Baleros

Let's start over.

Here starts the beginning of my new blog. It's been quite some time since I've truly used anything to blog. The last time I did any kind of blogging was back in the Xanga days of middle school. School is school. Life is life. Friends are friends. Things have just been as simple as that. Follow me as I record my life in words. The difficult times. The easy times. The fun days. The not-so fun days. Times where I want to cry. Times where I just feel so accomplished. Let's do life together :)

Rick Baleros